Quarter-Final # 1 : Ranjana Sharma vs. Rahul Ranjan

*) - Day -1 : A Mini Adventure

(Ranjana Sharma)

We saw our first sunrise in 'The City Beautiful- Chandigarh'on 22nd of july 2013. Our first step to a new city and college life as well. I know it is beautiful... but then apna shimla toh apna hi hai yaar!
I don't have a reason to share this experience, its simply I find it worth being discussed! maybe under adventure and tragedy as well! Well... the day started with a morning walk. It was for the first time we were walking along the streets of sec 32 and very soon we realised 'the city beautiful' deserves another title 'the confusing city.' Not a tree is different from another; neither a house different from any other nor are the roads! Well we were both( a friend anjali and I) upset and quiet. Away from home, family,friends and to add up such a hot place.

It is rather difficult for people like us to adapt to a place where a monsoon morning sun is warmer than a summer afternoon sun in our land. From a place where a few months ago we went to tutions slipping and skitting and sliding over the snow to this place where we were melting like snow! Studies reveal that walking helps reducing stress and helps getting mood better and it did work! Almost after 15 minutes we were back to life again! In a park we met our first friend in the town, a handsome white dog running in lush green grass. As soon as I called for him without much expectations he ran towards us with a very happy and a welcoming tail, if you know what I mean. Probably you do. Dogs have happy tails after all! :)

We returned and arranged ourselves on the bed and realised it had started raining. Such a relief! Our room mate who is a class senior to us said we could be late on the first day as it would just be general introduction. Hence we preffered waiting for the rain to stop. Well the rain atleast made the sun tollerable plus clouds favoured us the entire day. As soon as we left for the college after getting ready, we realised we were on a whole new journey.It was just 10 minutes of walking distance. And wow mahn! the crowd asked us not to be very confident! Our room mate was our only support and anjali and I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The crowd included old students, new comers, faculty and a few extras. We stood in front of the notice board where Ritu di left us. And now we were 2 little lost children in a totally new world.

There were a lot many confusions regarding the time table and classes had a lot of gap in between. After attending our first class in separate rooms we met in the canteen. I had a few new friends with me none of whom I remember by now and Anjali as confused as ever.

We had an hour approximately. And felt dumb staring at each other quietly and then looking around all wierd beings. "yaar aaj vapis chlte hain kal se pkka saari classes lgaaenge!" "pkka???" "haan " "chal toh!"
After walking for about 15 minutes we realised we were lost! It was funny though we were lost in our own block and then to add up to the confusion no matter what direction we picked up we reached the same temple which now started smiling at us in an evil manner. It looked same from all the sides and we couldn't make out what direction to choose. After we reached the temple almost 3 times we finally moved towards a direction we thought was right and yes at last we were home.

We thought our adventure was over and rested for a while. Then something awaited us! We thought of exploring the area. Rikshaw wala suggested sec 22 and we had nothing better to do as well! Even the market looked the same from all sides, angles,turns and shops. I don't know what shops we missed and how many of them we visited twice or even thrice.Wow! we struggled for getting out of it after a bit of shopping. Now we had some more time left, so we heard about sec 19.

Rikshaw wala- yahan se 2 km hai. "bs 2! chal lenge."
"2 km chl ke jaoge?" "uncle hum shimla wale hain hum chlte hi hain."
I don't know what made people open their mouth this wide hearing this. But atleast we enjoyed our walk and reached the market.

The corner where we entered from we found a man selling juices and shakes. Being thirsty we went for it. We saw a few food stalls right in front but decided to roam about a little and then come back. And again we lost our directions and ended in some another corner. Right in front there was a dhaba where we could see local crowd. What locals eat tends to be good. We could no more return back to the corner with much more variety because we knew while doing so we'll get to some another place again.

One plate chhole tikki and another chhole bhature. Aha! It came in good quantity and bhuke toh hum janmo se hi hain! It was an open air thing with a few tables and chairs places beneath the shade of 2 trees. Well... We settled on one corner table and started having our delicious meal!

Just a few bites were left when a child of about 15 years of age came and sat on a chair right next to me. For a minute i failed to understand, maybe somebody was reserving seat. But... who??? After not paying much attention for a minute I turned to Anjali,

"ye... maang rha hai?" "pta nhi!"
After a thoughtful moment, we turned to the kid,"kya hua bche?"
"bhukh lgi hai kuchh khila do!"Having a social back ground we started off with a conversation

"Tum roz aise mang ke hi khaate ho?"
"haan"
"Rehte kahan ho?"
"Yahin sota hun 19 me!"
"Ghar pe kaun hai?"
"Koi nhi! Bahar khule me sota hun."
"accident hua tha, yahin par."
''karte kya the?"
"papa mummy aise hi jhhadoo lgate the"
"Us tym kahan rehte the?" "Makaan tha,kiraye pr... makaan malik ne nikal diya. "

"toh aise hi nikal diya?"
"haan"
''tumhara gaaon kidhar hai?''
"Luknow"
"vahan kaun kaun rehta hai?"

"mera bhai.matlb chache ka ldka!"
"vo kya krte hain?"
"shadi hogyi hai."
"unko pta hai ye sb? "
"haan"
"200 rupya kiraya lgta hai mere pas 200 rupya hota toh me toh kbka chla jata."

As we were ourselves new and lacked all resources the best we thought was to contact child helpline india. After giving him a plate of channa chawal and having a lot more discussion we called up on the helpline no. "ma'am hum log chandigarh se bol rhe hain. yahan hume 1 bcha mila hai jo keh rha hai ki vo anaath hai iske parents 3 mahine pehle 1 accident me expire hogye hain aur ab ye akela rehta hai aur maang kr khata hai." We were connected to a local branch who asked for our location and details of the child. They asked us to wait near some kind of landmark around the market. When we asked about any such place from the locals they said 'hanuman mandir' Temple again! As if all threads were leading us here. Things started opening up and becoming clear.

We gave him our no.and asked him to dial it on my cell just to know he could which he failed to do. He lied ! He could not read. Now almost 30 times we asked him jhooth toh nhi bol rhe ho na yaar. And hi kept refusing. Within 2 hours the helpline people reached us. Enquired him and took a few photographs of him and even us. They asked him where in Lukhnow he wanted to be and coincidently it was bhaiya's district. We left for our pg while bhaiya decided to go to the police station with the child first and then go to lucknow.
We weren't even home when we got a call saying the child was lying. We wanted him to learn a lesson but more than his it was someone else's mistake. But then we did make a difference and next time he'll think twice before going to some table. Bas iske baad Chandigarh bhi apna hogya...

-the end-

Rating - 49/100 

 Judge's Comment

Lazily written , not well structured and explored themes and events ! a mini adventure without the real spirit of adventure expressed in words caused tragedy to the story itself ! why this day -1 story /experience is worth discussion is left undiscussed ! too much reliance on ‘reader’ side of imagination ! its  a very good life experience but badly expressed in writing !

 *) - Retaliation

(Rahul Ranjan)

Karib 2500 saal pehle----

December ki karkarati sard-hava mein saraswati nadi ki tatt par labade pehne 9-aadmi kisi ko ghere hue hain.Unnko 9 mashalein gheri hui hain.Beech mein khara vo shaks baari-baari se unn sabhi ko ek-ek laal kitab thamata hai.Fir punah apni jagah vaapas khara hojaata hai.

Ashoka:-(hava-mein-haath-khare-kar)Raatri ke teesri pahar mein main pavitra-purkhon ki aatmaon ka aahvahan karta hoon.Jagrit ho.

Itna kehte hi aasman mein bijliyan karakne lagti hai.Kaale baadal faarr,safed dhuan umarta hai aur jaal rahi mashalon ko bujha Ashoka ke mukh mein pravesh kar jaata hai.Fir Ashoka ke bajuon mein bane tattoos ek-sire se gayab hone lagte hain aur unn 9-admiyon ke bajuyon mein ubharne lagte hain.Kuch der paschat---

Ashoka:-Ab aap log inke rakshak hain.Inme se har kitab prithvi ka nirman ya vinash karne ke liye paryapt hai.Inki madad se main bharatvarsh ko ekjut kar paaya hoon.Jarurat pare to aapni jaan de dijiyega lekin inko kisi aur ke hath katabi nahi lagne dijiyega.

2013AD------

Hum log aazad duniya mein rehte the.Khane-peene ki aazadi,ghumne ki aazadi aur sochne ki aazadi.Lekin fir achanak sab kuch badal gaya.Vah aazadi khatam hogayi.Aaj humlog jinda rehna to door,mar bhi apni marzi se nahi sakte.Har din isi ummeed mein katate hain ki koi masiha aayega aur iss jinda nark se mukti dilayega.

Charon taraf tabaahi ka nazara hai.Peron ko bauna banata hua laashon ka dher bicha hai.Jismani kate-sir kisi ko ghur-ghur kar dekh rahe hain.Vah shaks khauf mein choor kisi larki ke saath betahasha bhag raha hai.Unka kulhari liye dusra shaks picha kar raha hai.Achanak thokar kha pehla shaks aur larki gir parte hain.Mauka paa dusra shaks kulhari se unn par var karta hai.

Amar:-(nind-se-achanak-uthte-hue)Nahii!...(tezise-saans-lete-hue)Bura sapna....par..par..(aaspas-dekhte-hue)Main kahan hoon...aur yahan pahuncha kaise...main to surangon mein kaid tha...

Amar ke bhujaon me glucose-pipes aur badan ke kai jagahon par pattiyan lagi hui thi.Unko noch vah bistar se uth apne ward se baahar nikalta hai.Bahar ka nazara dekh vo dang reh jaata hai.Nazara to kisi samanya aspatal kihi tarah tha.Maujud sabhi log apne karyon mein vyast the.Bas fark itna tha ki sabki aankhein aisi gol mudra mein thi ki jaise ab fatt kar bahar nikal aaye.Amar sabse apne baare mein puchne ka prayas karta hai.Par kisi se use prashno ka uttar nahi milta.Haar kar vo aspatal se baahar nikalta hai.Baahar sarak par bhi use kuch vaisa hi nazara dikhta hai.

Amar:-Ye kaunsi duniya hai?

31May,1984----

Humari ankhon par kaali-pattiyan aur hathein bandhi hui thi.Kuch log hath pakar kahi lejaa rahe the.Hame ek-kamre mein lejaaya gaya jahan kuch der sannata raha.Fir kisi ki awaz gunj uthi.

Lady:-Ab tum dono pattiyan hata sakte ho.

Humne pattiyan hatayi.Awaz jaani pehchani lag rahi thi.

Veer:-(ghabrate-hue)we are honoured to meet you.

Indira-Gandhi:-Veer-Shekhawat aur Rahul-Shekhawat aap R.A.W ke sabse honhar,sincere aur vishvasniye agents hain.Your country needs you.

Rahul:-We are at your service ma'am.

Indira-Gandhi:-Tumhe 9-Shokasya-Suktim kitab khoj kar lana hai.

Veer:-Kitab?Bas itni si mamuli baat.

Indira-Gandhi:-Ve koi mamuli kitaab nahi.Ve gyaan ka adbhut bhandar hai.Unke vajah sehi Samrat-Ashok shaktishali shasak ban paya tha.9 mein se 1-kitaab iss vakt swarn-mandir mein kahi chipi hai.Baaki ke baare mein mujhe nahi pata.

Rahul:-Par Swarn...

Indira-Gandhi:-Kal jab Operation-Blue-Star shuru hoga tab tumhe mauka miljayega.Ye hamaari pehli aur akhiri mulakat hai.(Kagaz-thamate-hue)Ye mera personal secured phone-number hai.Koi bhi jaankari milne par iske dwara khabar kar sakte ho.(devices-dete-hue)Yelo...atyadhunik sanchar-madhyam---Mobile.

Operation-Blue-Star---Bharatiye sena dwara anjaam diya gaya kaala dhabba.Afvah uri thi ki saare gurudwaron ke tehkhaano mein hathiyar chupaye gaye the.Bas isi mein prime-minister Mrs.Indira-Gandhi ne millitary force dwara gurudwaron ki chaan-been shuru kar dithi.Par sikhon ko ye dharm ke prati avhelna lagi aur jung chirr gayi.Helicopters,tanks aur pata nahi kya-kya swarn mandir par charhai keliye aaye the.Iss afra-tafri mein main aur Veer sikh ka bhes dhar,tehkhano mein pahunhce.Uss vakt tehkhane mein aur koi teesra nahi tha.

Rahul:-Kisi bhi pal koi bhi aasakta hai.Kaam ko jaldi niptana hoga.

Veer:-(ceiling-dekhte-hue)Bahar se swarn-mandir aur andar tehkhane ke dimensions mein antar hai.Yahan ek-aur khufiya tehkhana hai.

Fir hum dono talash mein jut gaye.Main tehkhane ka chakkar kaat raha tha ki tabhi ek-kone par truti ka ehsaas hua.

Rahul:-Goliyon ki awaz se pura tehkhana gunj raha hai.Par iss kone ke paas to jaise aawaz absorbed horahi hai.

Veer deewar ke paas jaatkar tatolta hai.Darasal uss kone mein do-deewar aise khaas kon par bani thi ki door se dikhne par jure hue lagte the,lekin asal mein dono ke beech bahut sankara raasta tha.Uss raaste ke sahare hamare hath pehli kitab lagi.

Lakshya-heen Amar sarak ke kinaare chal raha tha.Pichle kuch din ghati ghatnayein flashbacks ki tarah uske mashtishk mein ghum rahi thi.

"Welcome Amar to CID....kidnapped Saurav-Priyanka ka pata lagao.....sukshm neonites ke aavishkarak......neonites ke codes badal dene se insaano ko robots ki tarah niyantrit kiya jaa sakta hai.....hava dwara sharir mein pravesh karte hain....Shimla ke ghar mehi chipe honge Saurav-Priyanka darr se....nahi goli mat chalana...surangein dhane lagegi...."

Amar:-Ab main samjha.Duniya par kisi ne neonites ki madad se kabja kar liya hai.Par main hoon kaunse shahar mein iss vakt.Shimla to nahi lagti.Raat honeko hai.Paise hai nahi aur Raat bitane ki jagah chahiye.

Amar ne kai door-bells bajayi.Lekin Neonites ke vashikaran mein fanse kisi nebhi darwaza nahi khola.Kuch der khojne par use veeran makaan dikha.Haar kar vo vahi chala gaya.Makaan kai saalon se veeran para tha.Andar ghoop andhera tha.Lighter ke mandhim raushni mein vo aage barhne laga.

Amar:-Ye badbu kaisi?

Amar badbu kior barhta hai.Kuch door pahunchne par use aisa nazara dikha jo rongte khare kardene keliye kaafi tha.Ek aadmi,lash se antariyan nikal kha raha tha.Uska muhn puri tarah khoon se ranga tha.Raushni dekh vah Zombie Amar par jhapatta marta hai.

Air-India mein baithe humdono apni agli manzil kior ravana horahe the.Jaane se pehli Shokasya-Shuktim par puri research hamne ki.Shokasya-Shuktim 9-kitabon ka sankalan tha jisme duniya ki saari gyaan samahit ki gayi thi.Har kitaab alag field of knowledge se sambandhit rakhti thi.

1>Mashthishkam----Pyschological Warfare

2>Shatraghanikam---Fight Technique

3>Sukshmjaiveeki---Control of Atoms Properties

4>Rasayanam---Chemical engineering

5>Sanchar---Communication with aliens.

6>Gurutvam---Gravity and Anti-Gravity Knowledge

7>Brahmand-Vighyanam---Knowledge of deep space

8>Gyatprakash---Control properties of light

9>Arthshastra---Accurate predictions of rise and fall of empire.

Ye 9-kitab Ashoka ne maarne se kuch din purv 9 khaas logo ko dediya tha aur unko inki raksha ka jimma suampa tha.Kehte hai ki jo log jis shetra mein maahir the unhe unhi shetra se sambandhit kitab saumpi gayi.Unn 9-logo ne marte dum tak kitaabon ki raksha ki.Par uske baad ve kitaab kahi gum hogayi.Inn kitabon ko khud bhagwan parshuram ne shayan-chakra mein jaane se pehle Chandragupta-Maurya ko bhent kiya tha.

Amar iss achanak hue hamle se sakpaka gaya.Zombie ke hamle ne use wahi zamin par gira diya.Amar ne bachne ki koshish bahut ki,par adamkhor ke dant uske gale par dhans gaye.Rakt ka sailaab umar para.Dard se chatpatatane laga.Tabhi uske hath mein cricket-bat ka ehsaas hua.Puri taakat ke saath Amar ne hamla kardiya.Gend ki tarah zombie ka sir bhi uchal gaya.Aur amar apne khoon ke saath zombie ke hoon se bhi naha gaya.Ghav par hath rakh vo khara hua.

Amar:-(dar-ke)Zzzooommmbbbiiieesss!!!

Tabhi wahan police-siren ki aawaz gunj uthi.Amar baahar jaata hai.Baahar 3-4 police gariyan lagi hui thi.Ek gari par bare-bare aksharon mein 'Containment Pod' likha hua tha.Usme se kai police waale nikal Amar par banduke taan rahe the.Police waale bhi neonites ke vash mein the.Fir ek mahila head-inspector masks aur shields pehene containment-pod se baahar aati hai.

Amar:-(surprised)Nisha...tum?Par tum to surangon mein kaid thi.

Nisha darasal unlogo mein se thi jo Neonites haasil karne ka prayas kar rahe the.Amar ko uska jawab to nahi mila.Badle mein Nisha uske dono hath piche kar hathkari laga deti hai.Fir use containment-pods mein leja,sabhi police waale jaise aaye the,vaise hi kahi ravana hogaye.Kuch der mein gariyan nazuk-pathrele sarak par pahunchi jiski ek or pahar to dusri or antheen khai thi.Raat ke iss vakt sirf gariyan hi sarak ko raushan kar rahi thi.Tabhi sannate mein bahut saare zombies ki bhayanak cheekhen samahit hogayi.

Caller-Phone:-Ma'am we have a situation.

Nisha:-Don't stop...kill them all.

Fir gariyan bina ruki zombies ko aise cheerti jaane lagi jaise garam chaku makhan ko cheerta hai.Kuch der tak to plan kargar saabit hua.Par zombies ki tadad bahut jyada thi.Achanak gariyan ke pahiye jaam hogaye.Bhukhe bheriye khirki torte hue police-officers par toot pare.Rahi-sahi kasar gussaye zombies ne puri kar di.Kuch vans ko khai kior dhakel diya.Durbhagyawash Containment-Pod bhi unme se ektha.

Lakshwadeep---Bharat ke sabse ghane aur shant jangalon mein se hai.Track-suit pehne aur hath mein naksha liya dheere-dheere humdono manzil kior barh rahe the.

Rahul:-(bechain-hoke)Humlog pichle 4-ghante se lagatar chal rahe hain.

Veer:-(naksha-dekhte-hue)Bas paas mein.

Tabhi peron ki jhurmut mein aahat sunai deti hai.

Rahul:-(charo-or-dekhte-hue)I think we are being followed...

Isse pehle main nakshe se dhyan hata paata....hamare gale par kuch akar chubha.Hamara dimaag behoshi ke gart mein girta chala gaya.

Rahul:-Inn adivasiyon ki......

Pata nahi kab tak hum behosh rahe.Par jab aankhein khuli to apne aap ko bans se bandha paaya.Pure sharir par nimbu-fal-fool veerajman the.Tabhi saamne Rahul ko bans par pakte dekha.Koi aur adivaasi vahan nahi tha.

Rahul:-(chilla-kar)Abe idhar-udhar kya dekh raha hai.Mera yahan ram-naam satya hone waala hai.

Main puri zor lagakar bandhano ko torne ka prayas karne laga.Bandhan to nahi tuta par bans pura zamin se ukhar gaya.Bans ki bojh ki parvah kiye bina main Rahul ki or daur para.Aag se pehlehi kamjor hue rassi ko torne mein jyada vakt nahi laga.Lekin utnihi der mein pura kabila piche par gaya.Gussail adivasi najaane kya-kya kautuhul macha bhale-talwar liye hamaarior barh rahe the,

Veer:-Chal,Bhagte hai yahan se.

Rahul:-Ek minute ruk.

Rahul tezi se kabile-sardar ke ghar mein jaakar tracking-equipments,jise aadivasiyon ne hathiyaliya tha,keaaya aur fir hum dono bina sans liye daur pare.Kai ghanton tak hamara picha hua.Fir pata nahi kya hua ki ekaek adivaasi hamara picha karna chor diye.Unke chehre par bhai ke lakeerein jhalakne lagi.Rahul yahan shekhi bagharne se baaz nahi aaya.

Rahul:-(adivasiyon-ko-dekte-hue)Ab kya hua tumlogo ki...darr gaye na humse...(kandhe-par-ehsaas-hota-hai)Are Veer hath hata apna..

Veer:-Par maine kaha pakra tumhe...

Rahul:-(piche-murke)Chooorrrrr...(aankhe-fati-ki-fati-reh-gayi)

Isse pehle humdono kuch samajh paate,achanak vahan maujud per jinda hogaye aur apne tehniyon,shakhayon,se jakarne laga.Vahan par hava mein latki aur zamin par dhansi laashein saaf ishaara kar rahi thi kiaajtak koi bhi jinda nahi vapas lauta.

Veer:-Vahan dekho....dusri kitaab....(thori-door-par-bare-per-ke-sabse-upar-teheni-par-kitab-rakhi-hui-chamak-rahi-thi)

Rahul:-This was nothing what we had signed up for.

Veer:-Shokasya-shuktim jadui kitab hai.Unka jadu unki khud kiraksha kar raha hai.Hume pehli kitab---Mashthishkam---bhi jadui hai.

Rahul:-To kya uska aachar daaloge.

Main side-bag se kitab nikal shlok parhne lagta hai.Aur adbhut roop se per shant hone lage.Kuch der mein dusri kitab---Gurutvam---bhi hamare hath lag gayi.

Subhah hogayi thi par gariyon ke parkhachhcon se nikal raha dhua suraj ko dhake hue tha.Behosh Amar ki aankhein khuli.Uske upar malba gira tha jisse vah sirak-sirak kar nikal paaya.Uthkar usne apne charo taraf faili tabaahi ka manazar dekha.Koi bhi jinda nahi bacha tha.Par usse bhi jyada adbhut baat to ye thi ki uske ghav apne aap bhar gaye.Tabhi use kisi ki karhane ki awaz sunai di.Nisha jinda thi par malbe ke niche dabi puri tarah ghayal.Amar use malbe ke niche se nikalta hai.Uske hathon se achanak kiran nikalne lagi aur nisha ke ghav bhi avismarniye roop se bhar gaye.Uski aankhein bhi andar jaane lagi.

Amar:-(surprised-shocked)Ye--ye sab kya horaha hai?

2-Shokasya-Shuktim kitaabon ko safaltapurvak haasil karne ke baad hamaara utsah charam par tha.Hum teesri kitab ki talash mein lag gaye the.Par man mein kuch sawal janm lerahe the.Tabhi mera phone baj utha.

Phone:-Veer-Shekhawat!Aap dono bahut hi kabil aur honhar officers hain RAW ke.Ye bhi sun chuka hoon ki 2-Shokasya-Shuktim haasil kar liya hai tum dono ne.

Veer:-(gusse-me)Kaun ho tum?

Phone:-Main General Dei hoon...Opus-Dei samrajya ka...Iss vakt puri duniya meri isharon par nach rahi hai.Agar main chahon to abhi yahan baithe-baithe tum dono ko matiyamet kar sakta hoon.Lekin mere paas offer hai....Join Opus-Dei.....you will be rewarded handsomely.Jawab soch-samajh kar dena.Know that if you're not with us then you are against us.

Veer:-Geedar bil mein chipta hai lekin sher baahar aakar muqabla karta hai.Himmat hai to saamne aao.

Phone:-(hanste-hue)Mere offer par vichar karna.Because I have this reputation of only coming at my enemies funeral.

Kisi gupt sthan par----

Andhere mein ek-aadmi baitha hai jiski sirf ungli par pehni anguthi dikh rahi hai.Tabhi '+' nishan ka mask pehene shaks pravesh karta hai.

Masked-Man:-Area-#AKZE118 mein zombies ka hamla hua hai.No survivors except for..(tablet-par-kisika-biodata-dikhakar)Amar-Vatsa.Shall we capture him again?

Other-Man:-Amar-Vatsa neonites ke prabhav sebacha raha hai.Use kisi bhi tarah hamaare saamne lao.

Ghav ajibo-garib roop se bharne ke 3-ghante baad Nisha ko hosh aata hai.Vo uthkar Amar ke paas gayi ji tabahi ki manzar ka muayana kar raha tha.

Nisha:-(apology-tone)Thank-you Amar mujhe Neonites ke prabhav se bachane ke liye...and I am sorry for what I did.

Amar:-Mujhe pura maazra batao.

Nisha:-Opus-Dei bahut bara khufiya sangathan hai jo kai varshon se chipa tha.Opus-Dei creator Maestro-Haulr ke hath kisi tarah neonites lag gaye aur uski madad se vo puri prithvi ka mallik ban baitha.Uska daaya-hath General-Dei hai jiski nigrani mein puri prithvi hai.Uchit tarah se shasan keliye prithvi ko areas mein divide kiya gaya.Ab saare desh ek-hain.Har area ka apna control-room hai jahan par Opus-Dei ke agents Neonites ko monitor-program kar logo par nazar rakhte hai.Sabhi log jaise programmed kar diye gaye hain.Sabhi aam-insaan kisi robot ki tarah subah uthte hai,kaam karte hai,tai-bhojan kar sojaate hain.Ve sab-kuch soch-samajh sakte hain,unhe bhali-bhanti pata hota hai kya sahi hai aur kya galat,par neonites ka sharir par kabja rehta hai.Chah kar bhi kuch nahi kar paate.Unhe kisi se baat karne ki anumati nahi.Sirf kuch varg ke logo kohi communication ki izaazat digayi hai.Opus-Dei ke agents khud bagawat nakarde isliye ve bhi neonites ke kabje mein rehte hain.Sub-Control-Rooms directly Central-Control-Room ke control mein rehte hai aur Central-Control-Room ko General-Dei control karta hai.Par inn sabse upar Maestro hai.Vishw mein faile pure neonites ko control karta hai.Uske paas ek anguthi hai jiske kaaran vo neonites ke vash sebacha rehta hai.

Amar:-Aur zombies kahan se paida hone lage.

Nisha:-Ye aisa rahasya hai jise khud Maestro bhi nahi suljha paaya hai.Pata nahi kahan se zombies aane lage hain.Pehle to ikke-dukke dikhte the.Par pichle 1-saal se pura-ka-pura shahar zombies mein tabdil honelagi hai.Maestro ki fauj bhi unka muqabla nahi kar paa rahi hai.

Amar:-Par itne kum samay mein itna bara samrajya kaise khara hogaya.

Nisha:-Kum kahan?Main tumhe 2-saalon baad dekh rahi hoon.

Amar:-(surprised)Main 2-saalon tak behosh raha!!!Ye kaise mumkin hai.Aur main neonites se kaise bacha.

Nisha:-Mujhe kisi bhi sawalon ka jawab pata nahi.But I know this much---I can't let a sick person rule the world.Are you with me.

Amar:-Absolutely.

Dhamki ki parvah kiye bina humlog teesri kitaab ki talaash mein lag gaye.Teesri kitab ki talaash hame Hind-Mahasagar ki gehrayi mein legayi.Kumari-Kandam samrat ashok ke rajya-kaal mein sabse bara aur hara-bhara bhumi hua karta tha.Lekin ek-bheeshn tsunami use apne saath legayi aur Kumari-Kandam vakt ke gaal mein kho gaya.Parantu humne use khoj hi nikala aur diving-gears pehen gehraiyon mein utar gaye.Samudra ke niche to bilkul alag hiduniya basti hai.Machliyon aur sari-sripon ke mukh ki tarah hamaari oxygen-cylinder se nikalte bulbule aaspas ke vatavaran mein ghulmil rahe the.Kuch ghante paschat hame bharat ka atlantic---Kumari-Kandam milhi gaya.Pura-ka-pura shahar dooba hua tha.Shahar ki sthapya(architecture)dekhte hi banti thi.Yeto pata tha ki kitab usi shahar mein hain par kahan---yenahi malum tha.Chote-bare malbe utha kitab ko dekhne lage.Kaam jaldi karna tha.Humlog bahut jyada gehrayi mein the aur oxygen bhi seemit matra mein thi.

Rahul:-(khojte-hue)Samudra mein bhi koi kitab rakhta hai...

Veer:-Yahi-kahi hogi kitab...main use mehsoos kar sakta hoon.

Khoj ke chakkar mein humlog khatre ko nazar-andaz kar rahe the.Achanak hume dharti ke hilne ka aabhas hua.

Rahul:-Ye jagah fault-point par hai.Bhukamp ke jhatke hain.

Par tabhi humne vo nazara dekha jo sir-se-pair tak rongte khare kar dene keliye paryapt tha.Zamin ka seena-faar kankaalon ki sena nikalkar hamarior barhne lagi.

Nisha:-(naksha-table-par-bichate-hue)Ye hai Maestro-ka samrajya.Main Control-Room Maestro ke saath Area-#HWO4229---New-Delhi---mein sthit hai.Wahan pahunchne ke do-raaste hain.

Amar:-(naksha-dekhte-hue)Area-#JBE9999 aur Area-#XXXXX----

Nisha:-Maestro ko abtak pata chal gaya hoga ki humlog jinda hai aur vo piche jarur aayega.Isliye humlog Area-#XXXXX se hokar jayenge---Jaipur--unn shaharon meinse hai jo sabse pehle zombies mein tabdil hogaya tha.

Amar:-So we will need weapons.

Nisha:-(apne-car-ke-paas-jaakar-dikki-kholke)You got them!

Veer:-Main pakka kisi horror movie mein hoon.

Kankaalon ki sena shor-machate hue hamaari or barh rahi thi.Kinhi ke hathon mein bhale to kinhi ke talwaar.Diving-poshak pehene hone ke kaaran humlog jyada furtile bhi nahi the.Na-hi hamare paas koi hathiya.Yahan takki dono mein se koi kitaab bhi nahi.Yeto pukka tha ki teesri kitaab hi ye avrodh khara kar rahi thi.Halaaki humlog furtile nahi the lekin fir bhi kathin parishram aur saalon ki training ki madad se vaaron se bach jaa rahe the.Vaar ghatak the kyunki jahan par bhi talwar lag rahe the wahan moti darar ubhar jaati thi.

Rahul:-Aise humlog kab tak bachte rahenge.

Veer:-Kitaab ko khojo...tabhi inse bach payenge.

Hamare liye aage kuan piche khai thi.Kitaab to aise hi dhundna mushqil tha upar se kankalo ki toli ne to ise namumkinsa bana diya tha.Par fir bhi humlog haar manane waalon mein senahi the.

Rahul:-Veer!Uss malbe ke niche se raushni nikal rahi hai.Honaho wahi kitab maujud hogi.

Veer:-You are right.Dusri kitaab bhi aisihi raushni chorr rahi thi.Tum kankaalon ko apne piche bajhayo,main kitaab haasil karne ka prayas karta hoon.

Plan ke anusar Rahul ne kankaalon ko apni taraf akarshit karliya.Mauka dekh main uss bare malbe ke paas gaya aur use hatane ka bharsak prayas karne laga.Malba dhere-dhere hilne laga.Niche ab mujhe kitaab kisi pardarshi gole mein band dikhayi dene lagi thi.Thori der ke liye main asavdhan hogaya tha.Aur ek bhaala meri or ravana hogaya.Jaan jaani nishcit thi.Par mere aur bhaale ke beech Rahul aagaya.Ek-jhatke se kitaab nikal vo mere baahon mein gir gaya.

Rahul:-Bahut dard kar raha hai...Main ab nahi bachunga Veer...meri yaad rakhna...(aankhein-band-karleta-hai)

Veer:-Nahi Rahul,tum mujhe chorr kar nahi jaa sakte.Please wake-up..wake-up...

Par uski aankhein nahi khuli.Kankaalon ki sena bhi najaane kahan gayab hogayi.

Rahul:-(ek-aankh-khol-ke)Main...mara nahi..(kitaab-ko-dekhta-hai)Gyatprakash...

Darasal wahan kabhi-koi bhi narkankal ki sena thihi nahi.Sab ek-chalawa tha...kitab dwara racha gaya.Koi aur rehta to darr ke maare dobara wahan kadam nahi rakhta.Oxygen kum thi par fir bhi humlog utsahit hovapas upar jaarahe the jahan Private-Tourist-Ship hamaara intezar kar raha tha.

Area-#XXXXX mein khoon ko zama deni waali shanti thi.Sabhi orsirf andhera-hi-andhera tha.Par iss andhere mein ek-gari tezi se kahi jaa rahi thi.Gari ki dheemi awaaz bhi bhukhe zombies ko akarshit karne keliye kaafi thi.Pata nahi kahan-kahan se saikron-hazaron ki tadad mein zombies gari kior pagal kutte ki tarah laggaye.Iss hahakar mein jeep se machine-gun ki aawaz bhi mil gayi.Amar machine-gun par pehli baar hath ajma raha tha.Par use dekh koi maahir sainik bhi sharma jaaye.Zombies pake jamunon ki tarah gir rahe the.Lekin fir bhi unki tadaad bahut jyada thi.Kuch zombies jeep par chahrne mein kamyab bhi hogayi.Unka muqabla Amar ne chaku nikal kiya.Kabhi gale par hamla karta to kabhi sirmein.Bina ruke kai ghanto tak aisa chala.Ant mein ve Area-#XXXXX senikalne mein kamyab hogaye.Jeep ke pichle hisse mein,jahan Amar khara tha vahan zombies ki laashein bichi hui thi.Tabhi ek-lash mein harkat mehsoos hoti hai.

Zombie:-Tum hame jitna maaroge,hum utna aate jayenge.

Amar:-Zombie bol nahi sakte....

Zombie:-We are neonites...We are mankind's salvation...A harbringer...your time has come to end humans....Nothing will stop us from eradicating humanity.

Amar:-Iss vakt to bas tum apni chinta manao.(pistol-se-sir-par-shoot-kar-deta-hai)..(Nisha-se)Nisha...hame jald-se-jald Main control-tower tak pahunch kar neonites ko nasht karna hoga.

Rahul mujhse pehle Ship par chahar gaya tha.Main uske jitna furtila nahi tha isliye thora samay laga mujhe upar pahunchne mein.Par upar jaise hi pahuncha,main bhauchakka reh gaya.Vahan Opus-Dei ki sena maujud thi.Rahul ki kanpatti par + nishaan waale mask pehene aadmi banduk taane khara tha.

General-Dei:-Tumhe mujhse milne mi chahat thina....Main aagaya.Ab ache bachche ki tarah kitaab mere havale kar do.

Maine Rahul ko ishaara kiya.General-Dei ne aise hamle ki kabhi asha hinahi kihogi.Humdono ne agents ko jald hi parast kar diya.Par General-Dei humlog se jyada shaktishaali aur trained tha.Kai ajib-ajib kalayon mein maahir tha.Uske vaar ne mere hosho-avaas chin liye.Jab main jaaga to Rahul aur kitaab dono gayab the.

Now----

Apne bhai Rahul-Shekhawat ko aajtak main nahi khoj paaya.Opus-Dei ne mujhe apne bhai ke katl ke jhuthe iljaam mein fansa diya.Aur kitaabon ki talaash main aaj-tak nahi kar paaya.Mera paas abhi sirf 2-kitaab maujud hai aur unki wajah sehi aaj main Neonites ke changul se aazad hoon.Par ab main aur nahi chipunga.Jinka intezar main kar raha tha,ve aagaye hain.Mujhe unki madad karni hogi taaki Opus-Dei aur Neonites ka samool naash hosake.Ye larai tabtak nahi jeeti jaa sakti jab tak saare 9-Shokasya-Suktim kitaab sankalit nahi hojaaye.Jo kaam main nahi kar paaya,use Amar aur Nisha ko karna hoga.Kyunki wehi manav-jaati ki aakhiri ummeed hain.

Rating - 65/100 

Judge's Comments 

 

Rahul me bahut acchi skills hai ‘structured’ writing karne ki , story entertaining thi , par out-sourced ideas and plots ko avoid karne ki jaroorat hai, aur unhe ‘indian context me ‘implant’ karne se originality nahi aayegi is baat ko samjhne ki jaroorat hai. Agar ve ‘implants’ karte bhi hai india me ya kisi aur geographical environment me to use fully ,creatively ,originally  “exploit” karne ki jaroorat hai, Jiski thodi-bahut kami is kahani me hai. kahaani apne me  standalone story honi chahiye, specially jab vo series me ho ! Agar ye sab properly hota to marks happily 90 /100 tak jaa sakte the! 

Result - Mr. Rahul Ranjan wins the match and moves to semi-finals. Miss Ranjana Sharma is eliminated from Freelance Talents Championship. This is not the last entry by Ranjana here as she will compete in her final match (with three other quarter final eliminations) for the 5th spot (and prizes announced for that Rank). 

Judge - Mr. Shambhu Nath Mahto (Author, Artist-Colorist & Research Scholar - History)