Round 2 - Team # 14 (Ajitesh & Siddhant) #ftc1516

*) - Eighty Four

I wipe off the tears from my bloodshot eyes,

As I peer at the images stuck on my bedside wall.

Of the religion of my people being raped and humiliated,

All in the name of law, order, national security and all.

I put on my turban and strap on my uniform,

Careful not to stain the khaki with my tears.
I am in the manliest of all manly professions,

I can not be allowed to cry out my fears.

Yet tears of blood and humiliation were cried,

When the Lady of Iron went ahead and charged.

She passed over a million other ways that she could have taken.

And into our shrine with her army she barged.

The fight was bloody, the aftermath bloodier,

With Gold and bricks and mortar falling to the ground.

She offered to build what she broken down herself,

But in the gesture, no consolation was found.

I walked out picking up the heavy piece of metal,

Cold and still as the witch's heart would be.

Duty comes first, they always say,

But what higher duty can be?

Than the duty to your soul, you conscience,

Than the actions you owe to your people everywhere.

And so the Protector became the Hunter,

Impatient to look into her dying, betrayed cold stare.

I picked up my bike, and kicked it to life,

I set out on my way, my nerves made of steel.

Justice shall be served today, I reminded myself,

It was too late for cowardice for me.

I reached her castle, to witness a siege,
I had not quite expected to see.

Liberty! Freedom! Tyrrany is Dead!

The old witch was no more to be.

I stood stunned at the gates, my feet of stone,

My prize snatched away from me, now laid to rest.

My people, on their own, had done the dreadful deed,

Deciding that I was too slow for their taste.

Jubilant, but stoic, I walked into the gates,

Brimming with excitement to look upon the face,

Of the woman who had taken away our pride,

Our dignity, the most religious of our space.

And even as whispers and muttering and pointings,

Grew steadily louder behind my back.

I walked on, full of joy and disappointment,

To look at the visage of that old hag.

But what happened next, was something that I,

Had not quite expected to feel.

I did not feel joy on seeing the Woman dead,

Instead I felt remorse and pity.

Her wispy hair, her shapeless lips,

That had brought many a score to heel.

Ordered nothing, talked still less,

Yet spoke though they were cold and still.

They spoke of trials and tribulations,

Of ordeals and a crown of thorns.

Of sorrow, of separation and desperation,

Of seeing everything she loves begone.

I could see through the tough decisions,

I could feel the pen strokes wounding her heart.

I could hear the truths she could not yell out loud,

I could smell what she had called a Fresh Start.

And in that instant I understood the explanations,

Which my intellect had failed to demand.

Things Mother did were beyond question,

For reasons bigger than I could pretend to understand.

I was humble, I was small, I was too small,

To walk around and see the other side of the coin.

She had her reasons, what I could not understand,

She had a headspace I could not join.

Confuse me not with a blinded follower,

That would kill himself off, staying a nameless face.

Consider me a believer, a convert to the faith,

Of Mother's Wisdom and her Infinite Grace.

In that moment of clarity, I bowed my head,

Humbled and marvelling at her reach.

Though Mother was gone, not by my hands,

She still continued to teach.

I turned around to hide my tears,

And walked out ignoring what I shouldn't have.

The murmurs and whispers and pointings,

Had grown louder and clearer and stark.

I walked out of the ruins, tears streaming down,

Unable to comprehend or recall,

I kicked up my bike, and rode into the night,

Unaware of what was about to befall.

They came in mobs, swarms, like vultures,

They plucked me from my life.

They tore and snapped and clicked their beaks and stung,

Their swords, torches, clubs and knife.

I stared into the eyes of death myself,

Quietly marvelling at the dark irony.

To see myself be on the other side of it all,

The perp becoming the victim of the felony.

I would love to ask you to marvel and express,

complacency, awe and shock.

On seeing this cruel twist of fate,

But Alas! I can not.

Thoughts become actions, actions become the man,

I had had thoughts that did not befit.

And so here I lie, broken, bruised and bloodied,

But my end, as I see it, does fit.

Call it my penance, my retribution, my punishement

Call it whatever you want.

But at the end of this long, lonely day,

Bemoaning my fate is something I can't.

I believe I do deserve it, do not ask me why,

For I would not have an answer to it.

But I had planned to kill Mother in a moment,

Of righteous, pretentious rage's fit.

My punishment is true, and just,

And truly befitting my crime.

And I accept it graciously,

Bemoaning nothing but the time.

For I would not see the glorious tomorrow,

One where what Mother taught,

Would be heard louder and clearer,

Her death spreading the message her life sought.

Her death would galvanize, every Indian,

Maybe in ways we could not expect.

But Mother would never be gone from this country,

Till for Determination there is still an iota of Respect.

==========================

Rating - 30 stanzas!!.. beautifully written, goes well with the powerful image....quite emotive, it was like reading a story as you tied them together well. This is what I call a comeback. Well done! 

Rating - 174/200 Points 

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 279/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 12 (Frank & Mark) #ftc1516

*) - Fire

In the midst of a thousand street turns and a million different faces, there lies a green paradise. Once through these gates, the city of London becomes a place, far away. The constant city noise is replaced by rustling autumn trees, as a breeze gently stirs the brown leaves in the grass, squirrels dance. The shadows of the trees offer a retreat. In the middle of the green grass, there is a wide dirt path. A path that has been walked on for longer then the ones who walk on it. As the path twists and turns its way through the shadows and leaves, it leads towards the cry of swans. The water glimmers in the sun as the swans dive to feed beneath the water of the pond.

Behind a curtain of trees, dark brown buildings peek through, wanting their presence to be noticed. The hollow emptiness of windows peer at those who find their path through the trees. The dirty water splashes against the edge of the pond as a swan takes off into the air competing with the roaring of engines above.

A figure approached the pond and settled on a bench under the careful watch of swans.

A faint smell of a smoky fire filled the Man’s lungs. It was dark now, but there was a strong orange glow in the distance. With the sound of crackling and bursting, the man came to notice the animals were nowhere to be seen. Looking up, he froze as the imminent reality became ice inside his heart. In these times of wood what would be left? Few were aware that this city was built to burn. The houses, the markets and carts; all built to burn. The streets were a maze for the trapped, trying to flee an orange plague that was taking the life of the city. The people here knew that plagues were to be feared. They all heard the stories and some had seen the effects of the most feared death. They had all muttered "Black Death" upon their lips in their pasts, and now, they were screaming as the living, orange plague swallowed them.

The Man sat in the orange glow, watching the burning city in the water’s reflection.

It was even darker and there was no fire now. The streets were still. The city was under a curfew; no light was to shine once the sun was set. The Man held his breath as he nervously wrapped a thick jacket around himself. The cold was sinking into his bones. He sat helplessly, frozen to the bench. A siren rang close by and he jumped to his feet. There was a roaring above in the night sky. They had come. A loud noise pierced through the air and rippled through the pond. More explosions rocked the ground and the figure fell to crouch against the bench. He buried his head into the bundle that he made of himself.

Fires had started once more and the orange in the sky darkened. The bombs continued to fall through the thick, heavy smoke. This time, the city could not survive. The figure pressed himself tighter into a human ball. The bombs were getting closer; he could hear them fall through the sky from the planes that flew over in a deafening chorus. Sudden darkness consumed him.

The sunlight hurt his eyes as he opened them. Had he survived? What was left of the city of London? He took a glance around himself. There were no fires, there was no smoke. The tall man rubbed his face and took another slow glance around him. He let out a heavy sigh and settled back into the bench. He jumped at the faint roaring of a plane, and yet another swan took off from the side of the pond. The figure held his face as he convinced himself that it was only a commercial plane. It was a different world to the past.

Who knew, by just looking at this green paradise, that it had survived so much, that it could have burned beyond recognition.
This paradise had survived many horrors in its long life, to become something peaceful and wise. The paradise was unmarked by pain and death and as long as history is made, it will still be the paradise that the people see now.

==========================

It's amazing! full of descriptive narrative, it gives a sense of actually being there, sitting alongside the man in the park. Killer bronzish digital painting. 

Rating - 155/200 Points

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 291/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 23 (Vibhuti & Manan) #ftc1516

*) - Desiderata

Chapter I

The Corsair and The Clairvoyant

The man with hazel eyes, ruddy complexion, and a harsh face threw a pouch of gold coins on the floor. He was ‘Captain’ Longinus Lawless, the infamous corsair who operated off the Frankish coast, a seasoned naval mercenary and, the terror of the seas.

“Where is it, the fabled treasure of Desiderata*, O clairvoyant?”, he asked the woman in front of him.

The woman was Philomena, the fortune teller. Some called her reincarnation of the oracle of Delphi, while some considered her a witch, not only because she was thought to be practising occult, but also because of her bewitching beauty. No one knew her age. One would think she had been around forever.

She gazed deeply into the magical glistening crystal on the ornate table in front of her, and announced: “to the east for the island of Avalon you must go but beware the misty deep waters hold your worst nightmares.”

*Latin for ‘things to be desired’. 

Chapter II

The Flying Dutchman!

Along with a ragtag crew of fifty, united solely by greed, Captain Longinus set sail in Lumière, a magnificent ship he captured years ago. “Eastward, ho!”, Longinus commanded. The ship, propelled by the crew comprising of oriental Lascars and Gaelic Celts, begin to glide. With clear blue skies, meandering frothy waves rolling off on the emerald ocean, and mild breeze, everything seemed to go off on a good start.

For the next seven days and seven nights they sailed and sailed. On the eighth day, an enormous tsunami arose, bringing with the Kraken- the sea monster. The nautical myths of yore were true. The seamen directed all their ammunition towards fending off the monster. Firepower failed to subdue it in the slightest, and it begun to approach the Lumière. Everyone felt their end was near. Few ever escaped post-encounter with a Kraken.

Just then, they heard the loud rumbling sounds of a propeller. A giant ship, of vintage design emerged out of the thin mists. It looked very unreal, flickering like a projection. The monster was extremely terrified of it and dived quickly into the waters, and did not emerge back. The crewmen of Lumière looked at the ship with a deep sense of gratitude in their eyes. The ship had on its hull written: ‘THE FLYING DUTCHMAN’. In nautical folklore it was said to have been lost to the sea while on an expedition to recover the Desiderata several centuries ago.

Captain Longinus ordered his men to fire eleven rounds of cannon to thank and salute their saviour. After the ceremony was over, the phantom ship flickered on for a few more minutes, and then slowly disappeared back into the void it came from. 

Chapter III

Cargo Discharged

The sea is fickle. One fine morning, the weather suddenly turned inclement. The skies turned dark with a terrible tempest raging on, with bucketfuls of rain. The ship rolled on the giant waves like a paper boat in a murky stream. Soon, the situation seemed despairing for the rovers, who were busy emptying the ship off of water lest it flood it. By noon when the rains stopped and the storm passed away, the damage was done. The crewmembers were forced to throw away plenty of goods on board into the sea to lighten the ship, and this included their already reduced rations.

Longinus tried to bravely keep the spirits of his men up, who were clearly discontented with his leadership. The entire expedition had begun to seem very pointless to them, with the prospect of starvation looming over their collective heads. On being demanded to turn back, Longinus, however insisted they keep on sailing forward. The crew then hatched a nefariously desperate scheme. A burden had to be offloaded.

Captain Longinus Lawless was made to walk the plank by coercion. He soon found himself gasping for breath in the sea, and his pleas for rescue were met with laughter and jeers. His men have had enough of him.

Lumière turned back in the direction of the nearest port, which was hundreds of nautical miles away.

Chapter IV

Desiderata

He did not know for how long he tried to swim. At some point, he must have closed his eyes and surrendered to the water which eagerly plunged into his lungs. Yet his eyes were now open and he saw a darkly lit room in which there were mounds of gold bullions and coins, precious gems, and assorted jewels. Was he conscious or was he dreaming? Just then a familiar feminine voice entered his ears.

“Ah, so you have awakened!”, said Philomena, the clairvoyant. Longinus looked at her with disbelief. “You are where you wanted to be, in the presence of what you desired for. You are in Avalon, with riches lying in front of you”, she replied. He had begun to find her very mysterious.

“You washed ashore, as if it were meant to be. I need to show you something.” She asked him to see outside the window where there were hundreds of graves. “These are the resting places of the ones who came in search of Desiderata. No one returned alive”, she paused, and looked at him. “The real Desiderata is not gold, or diamond. It is what is inside you. What you seek is within.” Saying this, Philomena disappeared like she was never there.

Longinus pinched himself in the cheek, looked at the treasure lying around him, and the burial mounds. He stepped outside and sat down on the sands. The unending expanse of the sea, and the vast crimson skies seemed to smile at him. There was not a ship in sight. Perhaps there will appear one on the horizon to take him back, or not. It didn’t matter. The waters had washed his soul clean.

He was home.

                                                            END.

 ======================================

  I liked how well divided up this is...Nice job with the vernacular and character development within 1000 words but there were few loose ends and after 3 exciting chapters, all that building, the climax is kind of anti-climactic. Mesmerizing artwork!

Rating - 139/200

Total points after 2 Rounds - 283/400 Points

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 02 (Amit & Avijit) #ftc1516

Vision

Treta Yug – 7292 BC:

The battle of Lanka was about to end. The army of monkeys led by Sugreev and bears by Jaambvanth defeated the demon army lead by Ravan.

Destruction of Lanka was hurting Kalush, the only vampire soldier in demon army.

Killing all the monkeys around him, he walked towards the sea shore, away from battle-field.

He saw the sea waves with tears in eyes. His ears that could hear any sound in this world could hear the cheers and the chants of “Jai Shri Ram” in the monkey army. He realized that Lord Ram had killed Ravan.

Looking at the bridge called Ram-Sethu, Kalush thought, “I was born 3000 years ago and I was destined to be a king! I am alive because I am yet to fulfill my destiny! Ravan snatched Lanka from Kuber and established a demon kingdom! Joining the army of Ravan, I fought my first battle for him at Alkapuri against Kuber‘s army! That is when I had the vision of having my own Vampire Kingdom in Lanka! But now Lanka has been destroyed! The arson of Lanka by Hanuman burnt my dream! My vision!”

Suddenly, Kalush heard the familiar voice of his elder brother Alwar, “There is nothing for you in Lanka, Kalush! Please come home now!”

Kalush turned and was surprised to see his younger sister Ragini with Alwar.

Looking at his siblings, Kalush said, “Hanuman destroyed Ashok Vatika! I wanted to impress Ravan by defeating Hanuman, rise to ranks and one day overthrow Ravan! But Jambumaali and Aksh Kumar got the chance! Ravan kicked Vibheeshan! I hoped one day I would kick Ravan like that! Ram and Lakshman killed Kumbhkaran and Meghnaad! I hoped that Ram and Ravan will kill each other in war! I would kill Vibheeshan to become king! But Ram killed Ravan! Vibheeshan is all set to be the king that I wanted to be! Having studied so much knowledge in diverse fields over centuries, I am learned! I am fluent in Sanskrit and Tamil!”

Ragini said, “Being king is not everything! In the end, everyone needs happiness! No joy is bigger than family! Come home! We are family!”

Kalush turned, hearing the sound of a boat hitting the sea shore. He saw ten men coming out of the boat. His vampire senses told him that those men were werewolves.

Hiding behind rocks, vampire siblings heard Avibhuj, the leader of werewolves saying, “My brothers! Ram, the prince of Kosala is here to rescue his wife Sita who was abducted by Ravan! Now that Ravan is dead, Ram will return to Ayodhya with Sita soon! King Sugreev and King Jambvanth were here to help Ram and soon they will also return to their kingdoms once Vibheeshan becomes the king! Their army destroyed more than 90% demon army of Lanka! So we don‘t need army! Once, Ram, monkeys and bears leave, we have to attack the palace, kill Vibheeshan, declare ourselves as rulers, call our army and family and after that, establish a werewolf kingdom in Lanka!”

Kalush had seen enough. Taking a high jump, he literally flew into the sky and kicked Avibhuj on the face. Kalush and his clan were one of the oldest vampire clans in the world. They were among unique vampires that had the ability to walk in the sun. Hence, every werewolf recognized Kalush. They were shocked to see him.

However, Avibhuj was not an ordinary werewolf. His clan was also one of the earliest werewolf clans in the world. They had the ability to turn at will, use their wolf powers in human form and retain their human intellect in their wolf form. Even in his human form, Avibhuj was a skilled warrior with extraordinary physical strength. Kalush and Avibhuj exchanged blows. Both of them had witnessed various battles between vampires and werewolves over centuries. Their punches and kicks had no end. Avibhuj had the freedom to use his transformation power to turn into a four legged wolf or a two-legged wolf-man.

Strangling Avibhuj, Kalush said, “Lanka could not be mine but it will not be yours either!” Avibhuj turned into wolf-man, his throat getting free in the process from Kalush‘s grip by becoming larger. He punched Kalush. As Kalush fall, Avibhuj‘s brother Taraksh and friend Aranyashvan grabbed Kalush started scratching and biting him. Seeing this, Alwar and Ragini rushed towards wolves. Seeing them, Avibhuj shouted, “Brothers! We have to leave! More soldiers needed for these vampires! Run!”

All wolves got back into boat and started rowing it.

Later, Kalush was also in a boat sitting with Ragini, with Alwar rowing it. Ragini asked Alwar, “What should we do if Sursa shows up in the middle of the sea?” Kalush replied, “I will fight her! Hanuman will see there is someone as powerful as him!” Kalush called out, “Come out Sursa!”

To distract Kalush, Ragini said, “Kalp has been bitten by werewolves! We fed him with blood of animals and birds! In forest, we did not have any home! A kind-hearted man Yavakri and his wife Sushila gave us shelter!”

After an eight hours journey, the vampires reached a sea shore. They reached the cottage of Yavakri soon. They found Sushila crying over an unconscious Yavakri who had been bitten by a snake. Kalush decided to heal Yavakri. Yavakri got cured due to the miraculous power of vampire blood that Kalush dropped in his mouth. Sushila was thankful to Kalush.

That night, Kalush was alone when Yavakri and Sushila were sleeping inside the cottage with Alwar and Ragini guarding it. Suddenly, Lord Shiva appeared in front of Kalush and appreciated him for saving Yavakri‘s life. Kalush expressed his desire to have his empire. Lord Shiva granted his wish, giving him a glimpse of future, where he saw the events of Mahabharata, Dracula, British rule in India and his fight with werewolves in Kaliyug.

Seeing that, Kalush said, “My vision is not dead! It is alive! It will come true!”

THE BEGINNING

=======================

Rating - 121/200 Points

Nice experiment, but it's not a complete self contained entry. Degree of uniqueness in character traits of vampires and werewolves is less than what we read/see in already established series. 

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 249/400 Points

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 26 (Abhilash & Ashutosh) #FTC1516

                      *) - NAARI SHAKTI

          "maa!!inn sabhi aur aap ki ankhon me aansu??aisa kyun maa??" ek maasum ladki ke iss masoom se sawaal ne uski maa ka dhyan uski aor aakarshit kiya.

          "ye aansu to hamari vijay ka pramaan hai meri bete?" .maa ne dobara apni nazare saamne ki aor karte huye uttar diya.

          "uff maa!yaha to baarish bhi shuru ho rahi hai.bijli bhi chamakne lagi hai.hum sab bheeg jaenge."

bachchi ki iss baat ko sun maa muskayi aur boil-"aaj ye baarish bhi hamari jeet me hissa le rahi hai bete.ye bhi hamare iss jeet-utsav ki bhagidaar ban rahi hai.badal garaj kar aur bijli chamak kar hamare jeet  ki shobha badha rahe hai."

          "jeet?kaisi jeet maa?humne kya jeeta hai."

          "humne apna samman jeeta hai bete.apni laaj jeeti hai hai,apna gaurav jeeta hai.?"

          "kisse maa?"

          "unn parusho se jo hamesha se hum aurato ko sirf manoranjan ki vastu samjhte hai.hume samman nahi dete ,sirf sambhog ki vastu samjhte hai.jinhe ye lagta hai ki naari kamzor hoti hai,keval ghar samhalne aur purush ke atyacharo ko sahne ke liye bani hain." maa apni beti ki aor jhuki aur uske gaalo par hath sehlaate huye kaha.

         "vo kaun hai maa jo vaha beech me khadi hai?unke hath me talwaar hai aur sabhi unki jay-jaykar kar rahe hai?”

         “vo iss veeranganao ki senapti hai beti.”

         “kya inhone maara hai in sab ko.kisi ko marna to galat baat hai na?kya vo aur ye sabhi bure nahi hue?"

         "bure to tab hoti ye yadi inke atyachaaro ko chupchaap seh liya hota.apne upar huye atyacharo k dand dena galat nahi hot bete isliye inme se koi bhi bura nahi hai.bure to ye the  jinhone devi samaan pooje jane wali nariyo ko apni bhookh ka shikaar banana chaha.unka shoshan karna chaha." 

          “ye log kaun the maa?” uss masoom ne phir se poocha.

          “ye hamare podosi rajya ki sena hai beti.jinhone hamare sainik patiyo ko maarkar humare raja ko haraya hai.ab humara  rajya inke aadhin hai.is ghamand me choor inn sainiko ne hum par atyachar karna chaha…. ”

         “kya humari sahayata kisi ne nahi ki maa?”

        “jeevan me aisa samay aata hai beti,jab rakshak hi bhakshak an jaate hai.sahayata karne waale hi atyachaar par utar aate hai. Jaise ye purush..inka daayitva humari raksha karna tha lekin inhone kiya uske viprit . ye iss duniya ki vo kaali sachchai hai jise jitni jaldi samjh lo utna hi tumhara bhala hoga.aise  me apni sahayata swaym karni padti hai .isliye inhe bhi shastra uthane pade.khud sainik banna pada.aur ye ladayi ladni padi”

         “maa!.......agar hum haar jaate to??”

      “kaise haarte beti.jab swayam bhagwaan humare sath hain.bhagwaan bhi unka sath dete hai jo khud ki sahayata karne ko tatpar hote hai.ye humari ikchha shakti aur saahas ka phal hai jisne hume vijay dilayi hai.”

     “inhone aisa kyun kiya hoga maa?….humne inka kya bigada tha jo ye hum par atyachaar karne lage the??”

      “purush jaati par kabhi kabhi ahankaar haavi ho jata hai beti.ye ahankaar jab bhi inke sar chhadhkar bolta hai ye bhul  jaate hai ki naari hi hai jo inhe janm deti hai,inka jeevan sanwaarti hai,devi tulya pooji jaati hai,phir shuru hota hai inka atyachaar……..sath hi ye bhi bhul jaate hai ki jo naari jeevan dena janti hai vo nash karna bhi janti hai.aavashyakta padne par Sita se kaali bankar ahankariyo ka naash bhi kar sakti hai.”

      “ab to hum surakshit hai na maa?”

      “haaa bete!!…jis din  naari swayam ki raksha ke liye dusro ki aor dekhne ke bajay aap hi tatpar ho jaati hai usi samay vah surakshit ho jaati hai.dhyan se dekho ye drishya…sambhav hai kal tumhe bhi isi tarah ki samasya se saamna karna pade.aaj se hi swayam ko taiyaar karna shuru kar do.”  Maa apni beti ki har utsukta aur uski shankaye door karti jaa rahi thi.

       “mujhe bhi……..kya ye sabhi kal ko samasya me humari sahayata karne nahi aayenge.?”

       “avashya aaenge beti.lekin sabse pahle tumhe khud ko khud ki sahayata ke liye taiyyar karna hoga.”

         “sahi kehti hai tumhari maa beti.smaran rahe…..hum naariya kisi bhi roop me inn puruso se kam nahi hai.atyachaar sahogi to inse bhi badi apradhi kehlaogi,inhe inke atyachaaro ka humesha muhtod uttar dena.” Senapati veerangana uss bachchi ke pass aakar boli.

          “lekin kabhi hum kamzor pad gaye to yaa kahi inhone hume bhi isi tarah maarne ki koshish ki to?.” Uss bachichi ke chehre par ek darr sa chha gaya.

          “to phir apni laaj ki raksha karte huye veergati ko prapt hona tumhare liye garv ki baat hogi.ek baat humesha smaran rakhna…..ek naari ke liye uske samman se mulyavaan kuchh bhi nahi hota.apne jeevan  ka balidaan bhale hi de dena lekin kabhi apna samman naa jaane dena…..kisi bhi mulya par.agar aisa karogi  tp jis prakaar aaj ye sabhi meri jay –jaykaar kar rahe hai kal tumhari karenge.”

Uss chhoti si bachchi ki aankon me ab chamak aagayi thi.uss veerangana ke kahe shabdo ne uske mann me utsaah,himmat aur josh ka sanchaar kar diya tha.usi samay senapati ne usko apni talwaar thamayi.bachchi ne usse utsaah se upar uthaya.

      “mai bhi badi hokar aap jaisi hi banungi.kabhi koi atyachaar nahi sahungi .aur jo karega uska hasra bhi yahi karungi jo inka hua hai………NAARI SHAKTI AMAR RAHE!!.”

======================

Rating - 110/200 Points

Kahani mey sandesh aur saath mey ye art har daur k liye mahatvpoorn hai lekin kahani cliched, one dimensional chalti lagi. 

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 213/400 Points

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 15 (Amit & Rishi) #ftc1516

*) - Devil of the Sea

door daraj me basa ek samrajya  IKASTA  jo aaj apni ek bahut hi vikat paristhiti se jujh raha tha.praja jano aur  raja ke chehre par chinta aur darr ki lakire thi.mantri -mandal aur baaki sabha sado ke hosh ude  the.saamne thi aajtak ki sabse badi musibat jisne sabhi ka jeena muhaal  kar rakha tha.chunauti thi uss samasya ko jad se  khatm karne ki.

       IKASTA ek chhota sa dwip jo chaaro aor samudra  se ghira tha.raja aur mantri ki dekh- rekh me khushhaal.machhuwari praja hi thi inke aay ka mukhya shrot.door samrajya se  matasya vyapaar ne rajya ko malamaal kiya tha.praja ko samridhi pradaan ki thi.lekin pichhle kuchh samay se iss vyapaar ki gati dhimi ho gayi thi.praja ko garibi ka saamna karna pad raha tha.koi nahi janta tha kya thi iski asli vajah.

      Ek din koi vyapaari zakhmi sa dard se karahta taapu par mila.uska upchar kiya gaya,tab pata chala ki Unke vyapaar aur samrajy par nazar lagne ki vajah.koi samudra ka shaitaan tha jo vaha aane wale sabhi vyaapariyo ko  bich samudra me hi apna bhojan banata  jaa raha tha. Vyaapari jaate magar apne desh vapas naa pahuch paate isliye baaki ke rajyo ne dheere-dheere vyapaar  karna band kar diya tha.kisi ne abhi tak uss shaitaan ko thik se nahi dekha tha.par ye spasht tha ki vo jo bhi hai vishaal aur khatarnaak hai.

         Iss samachar ne jaise raja ki raato ki neend uda di thi.kaise ladte uss shaitaan se jiske baare me koi kuchh janta bhi nahi tha jo kayi vyaapari jahajo ko safachat kar chuka tha.  Ab to samasya aur bhi kathin ho gayi thi.koi rasta sujh nahi raha tha IKASTA  ke raja IKASO ko….

        Phir ek din mahamantri ne ek prastaav rakha…ki jo bhi uss shaitaan ko maut ke ghaat utarega use milega  IKASTA ki rajkumaari SELENA ka hath.vahi hoga IKASTA ka bhaavi raja.SELENA iss baat se raazi thi.koi der naa karte huye raja ne yah ghosna kar di aur intezaar me lag gaye uss bahadur ki jo unki iss chunauti ko swikaar karta.

       Rajkumari thi bahut hi sundar lekin phir bhi koi bhi aisa nahi aaya tha jo iss chunauti ko swikaar karta.thak haar kar ek din raja ne khud hi iss musibat se ladne jaane ka faisla kiya.tabhi darbaar me ek nauyuvaan  JACK ne pravesh kiya aur daava kiya ki vah uss musibat ko khatm kar aaega.raja ne use dusre din hi nikal jaane ki anumati di.vah uss raat raaj parivaar a mehmaan ban kar ruka.

        Usi raat yuvaan ne apni taiyari shuru kar di.tabhi ek aakriti ne uske kaksha me pravesh kiya.ye koi aur nahi rajkumari SELENA hi thi.jack ko dekhte hi uske seene se lag gayi.use uss shaitaan se ladne jaane se manaa karne lagi.vah nahi chahti thi ki uske bachpan ke pyaar ko koi bhi nuksaan pahuche.bachpan me taapu ke pass ek zehrile keede se JACK ne ise bachaya tha.tabhi se inme dosti hui aur inke jawaan hone ke sath hi inki dosti pyaar me badal gayi.rajkumari isse chhup-chhup kar milne aaya karti thi.

       Iss ghoshna ko sunne ke baad JACK ruk nahi sakta tha.uske parivaar ne use ab tak rok rakha tha.lekin ab vah aur nahi ruka.raja pad ke liye naa sahi,SELENA ke liye bhi na sahi,use apne rajya ko bachane ke liye ye karya karna hi tha.use yah katai gawara nahi tha ki vah yah soch kar mar jaaye ki vah apna rajya bachane ki koshish kar sakta tha par ki nahi.rajkumari ko aaj garva tha ki usne ek bahadoor aur nekdil ladke se pyaar kiya tha.SELENA ne use apne pyaar ki ek nishaani di..ek locket jo use musibat ke samay me unke pyaar ki yaad dilaega aur uske utsaah aur shakti ko badhaega.SELENA ke mann me darr tha par sath hi JACK ki bahaduri aur pyar par bharosa bhi tha.

      Faisle ka din aagaya tha.JACK ko puri taiyari aur hathiyaaro ke sath bheja jaa raha tha.chhori-chhipe chhat se SELENA ne bhi use shubhkamnaaye di.uski aankhein dekh koi bhi bata sakta tha ki vah raat bhr nahi soyi thi.

      Thik waisa hi hua tha jaisa JACK ne socha tha.uss shaitaan ke ilake aate hi uske jahaj par hamla kar diya gaya.apne aapko samhalte hue JACK ne use dekha to uski aankhein phati ki phati re gayi.ye shaitaan ek vishaal octopus tha.samanya se kayi guna bada.jise dekh kar hi maut aa jaye .lekin iss bahadur ke kandhe par apne rajya ki suraksha ka daayitva tha.vah kaise lade bina marta.

      Maanav samay-samay par apni bahaduri ka parichay deta aaya hai aur asambhav kaam ko sambhav kiya hai.iss samay JACK ko dekhkar aisa hi kaha jaa sakta tha.paani par saans lene ki chamatkari kala jo inn logo ko aashirvaad me mili thi vahi aaj JACK ke kaam aa rahi thi.sharir se khoon ki boonde nikal kar paani me ghulne lagi lekin usne haar nahi maani.

      kafi samay ho gaya lekin vah ab tak uss vishaal octopus ko kharonch  nahi paucha paaya tha.ab uske sharir ne bhi jawaab dena shuru kar diya tha.himmat jawaab de rahi thi.use uska ant nazar aane laga tha.tabhi uske gale se vah locket chhut usse door jaane laga .JACK ka josh use dekhkar wapas aaya.usne locket ko wapas pakda .octopus ke pass aane ka intzaar kiya aur ek sadhe huye vaar se use buri tarah jakhmi kar diya.bina koi dusra mauka diye JACK ne uss shaitaan ko khatm kar diya.

     JACK wapaas aaya raja aur rajkumari samet sabhi use dekhkar khush hogaye.pramaan ke aur par vah octopus ki ek bhuja sath laaya tha.ab vaade ke mutabik uski shaadi rajkumaari se shaadi hogayi.raja aur prajajan apne iss bahadur bhaavi raja se khush the.ab sab kuchh samanya hogaya tha.

     Ye pyaar ki hi shakti thi jisne asambhav ko sambhav banaya tha.

 =========================

Is entry mey art jitna achchha hai us muqable mey kahani mey nayapan nahi hai, naa hi yahan bhasha shaili prabhavit karne waali hai. Is wajah se rating kaafi kum ho gayi.

Rating - 94/200 Points

Total points after 2 Rounds - 214/400 Points

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 17 (Jorge & Ren) #ftc1516

*) - Attack!

A heavy axe fell down on a sailor’s head and gashed it. Jelly pieces of gray and white brain matter flew in different directions. If a hypothetical observer tried to distingish both kinds, he'd have to announce failure, as both were profusely decorated with blood. Also nobody around paid any attention to the brutal event. All soldiers were busy with a fight on the deck of a Byzantine ship, which accidently sailed north of the Black Sea and got to the Volga-river.

Soon after chopping one head, another decapitated one was rolling through the jelly fragments of the mentioned sailor’s brain, or maybe it was one of his comrades's viscera.

The owner of the heavy axe kicked some arm, already cut off but still trembling in convulsions. He cleared his way towards the next opponent.

Guys are not lazy. That’s good! he thought, for a short while wondering a chaotic dance of the shaking arm on the deck.

He was a jarl, the commander of the Viking ship who had just attacked the Byzantine dromon.

He approached his next enemy, and the same tactics succeeded again despite the opponent’s steel helmet. The next hostile seaman made a step back as soon as he realized that he was jarl’s next target. Having seen fear in his eyes, the Viking advanced, with an evil smile. The enemy's blood, which had already splashed his face, now went down making his teeth red.

The seaman was still getting back, but soon he unexpectedly slipped on unidentified viscera which had already profusely covered the deck. Lying among the different body parts, he noticed a liver under his head. It was soft almost like a pillow, and this was the last feeling in his life. The deadly jarl’s axe easily found home in his belly. Too easily. It dived deep into the sailor’s body, came through it, and stuck in the board of the deck. The tip of the axe must have also hurt at least one of sailor's lungs, as the blood splattering out of him was bubbling.

Jarl had problems with releasing his axe from the dead body. He noticed one of his comrades sent Valhallawards by a huge Byzantinian warrior. 

I can be the next one, flashed in his head.

Nonetheless, the bully was brought down by two other Vikings and pinned to the deck with his own sword.

The battle was over. Actually, it lasted not much longer than the time needed to read about it.  A surprise and a quick abordage were Vikings’ speciality.

Viking soldiers quickly discovered that the Byzantine dromon was carrying a precious load They just had to look on what was under the deck. They were overjoyed with their finding. 

"A huge load of silk!" shouted Swen, the smallest Viking warrior.

His fellow warriors quickly disappeared under the deck to admire their prey.

Only one Byzantine sailor survived the attack. He just gave up in the right moment. The Vikings ordered him to approach the jarl.

“You coward! You have chosen to give up instead of fighting with your fellow sailors. Looking at you, I feel only loath!!!”

The seaman, dirty with blood and viscera was standing with his head down, shaking. In different circumstances he would probably admire jarl’s pure Greek. Not only did the chief of the Vikings know the language, but also spoke very fluently. Indeed, the jarl used to serve in Byzantine army as a mercenary for many years.

The seaman who surrendered was given a task. Jarl ordered him to clean the deck. They had to transport the silk to their ship, and didn’t want it to get dirty with blood.

Sobbing, the Byzantine sailor collected the remains of his fellows, or rather the parts of their bodies and threw them into the river. Several times he had to stop and vomit, unintentionally entertaining the wicked pirates. For them he was a pathetic loser. A quick burial which in a different case could be classified as barbarous was assisted with a quiet prayer and tears of authentic, heavy sorrow.

After he had done the last duty for his mates he was called by the jarl who was standing near the edge of the ship.

Meanwhile, the Vikings washed their clothes and started to move packs of silk to their ship.

The Byzantine seaman approached the jarl, shaking.

Jarl started his speech. He pronounced a big portion of swearing to the seaman, mentioning his cowardiance once again. In the end he said, of course in pure Greek language:

“Despite your cowardiance, I appreciate how you cleaned the deck. You won’t lose your reward. Take the sword!”

The terrified seaman didn’t move a muscle. He was paralyzed with fear.

“Take the sword!” barked the jarl again, and put one of the weapons from the deck into seaman’s hand.

A quick, mighty whizz of air followed the blade of the jarl's axe. The Byzantine seaman’s head was rolling on the deck, leaving fresh red marks on the cleaned board, while a powerful kick sent the rest of his body aboard. There were neither piranhas nor sharks in the river, but other fish species found the sailor tasty. In a hurry, hey were sneaking into the corpse through the hole after the decapitated head. Soon, the smudge of blood spreading over the water hid their horrible feast.

The rest of Vikings applauded jarl’s charity with a roar. 

"Instead of condemning the coward, he allowed him to die with a weapon in his hand," said Bjorn, a broad-shouldered rower.

"Maybe Odin would welcome him in the kingdom of Valhalla," added someone else, grinning broadly.

The Vikings got everything they wanted from the dromon. They knocked pots with oil, and spilled it all around the deck and also under it. Then they returned to their drakkar and set the dromon on fire.

“It would be better if Byzantines didn’t know about our pirate attack. Especially if we are not going to change our point of destination.” thought jarl looking at the burning ship.

“Mighty jarl! Are we still going to Midgard, just as you have planned?” asked one of his soldiers.

“Sure Swen. I promised to show you the City of Wonders, and I’ll keep my promise. I’ve been there many times and even served in Varangian guard, as a soldier of the Emperor himself!”

“But we have just robbed and sank one of their ships, killing all the Byzantines…”

“Don’t worry. All the Vikings do such tricks. Soon we'll arrive to them and sell them their own silk which we have just stolen. In the capital of Byzantium we can exchange the silk for gold in the proportion of one to one.”

“But mighty jarl… What is propotion?”

“They will scale the silk and give us the same amount of gold, you idiot!”

The ship almost finished burning. Jarl turned his head and shouted to men holding oars:

“To Constantinople!”

===========================

Uber-beautiful art! very well done! Vivid gory description, but was directionless.

Rating - 126/200 Points 

WLP - Minus 9

Final Rating - 117/200 Points

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 202/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team 24 (Kapil and Soumendra) #ftc1516

मेहरगढ़के राजा महेंद्रसिंहने गुप्त-सन्देशको अपने विश्वास-पात्रोको दिखातेहुए कहा, "इसमें संदेह नहींहैं की अब हमेंभी कमर-कस लेनी चाहिए, ऐसेही सन्देश काठीपुरमके सम्राटके पासभी आयेथे। उस 'अज्ञात-ख़तरे'ने दो गुप्त-सन्देश भेजेथे...

सवारी गायब करूँगा
शान गायब करूँगा
अशुभचिंतक 'अज्ञात-खतरा'

... और कुछही दिनोंमें शाही अस्तबलमें से पूरे छप्पन घोड़े, कड़ी सुरक्षाको धत्ता दे गायब करदिए; फिर दो दिन बादही सशस्त्र सैनिकोसे संरक्षित काठीपुरमके राज-खजानेमें रखे सबसे कीमती चीज़ नीले-हीरे पर हाथ फेर गया"

अब हमें गुप्त-सन्देश आयेहैं ...
श्रृंगार गायब करूँगा
सुहाग गायब करूँगा
अशुभचिंतक 'अज्ञात-खतरा'

"शत्रु बहुत खतरनाकहैं, खुले-आम चेतावनीदे, नाकके नीचेसे इनको अंजाम देताहैं, मेरेभाई कुठारसिंह (काठीपुरमके राजा) ने इसे बहुत हलकेसे लिएथा और बहुत बड़ी क्षति उठानी पड़ी।"

पहाड़ोंसे घिरे तीन गौरवमयी राज्य काठीपुरम, मेहरगढ़ और सूरनगर। एकसे बढ़कर एक, जहाँ काठीपुरमको धनाढ्योकी धरती माना जाताथा, वहीँ मेहरगढ़के दुर्गकी पताकाको वीरतासे रंगा गयाथा। सुरनगर गुणज्ञों, मेधावियोंसे अटाथा। तीनोही एक-दुसरेके पूरक, तीनो-भाई हर मुसीबतमें एक-दुसरे के साथथे। उनकी एकताके आगे सभी पड़ोसी राज्योंके हौसले पस्तथे।

बात बाहरवीं शताब्दी कीहैं, करीब पैतीस साल पहले शूरवीर-दिलेर राजा कामेसुकुमारने छोटे-छोटे नगर जीतकर विशालकाय कामेसुगढ़ जरूर बसाया पर चर्चामें सदैव उनका महाकाय हृदय ही रहा। कामेसुगढ़ के राजगुरु मानुबाबा अलौकिक शक्तिधारी दिव्य पुरुषथे। उनकी छाँवमें कामेसुगढ़ पूरे ब्रह्माण्डमें सुरक्षितथा। तरुणावस्थासे ही कामेसुकुमारने अपने राजगुरुके चरण ऐसे पकडे जो उन्हें सिद्धि, समग्रता और सफ़लताकी नोंकपर स्थापित करगए। एक अभागे दिन मानुबाबाने हिमालयमें समाधि लगानेकी कहकर अनिश्‍चित कालके लिए राज्यसे विदाईली। बीस वर्षो तकतो राजाने प्रजाके दिलो पर राज किया, एक दिवस राजाने घोषणा की वो राजगुरुको खोजने जा रहेहैं।  जाते-जाते कामेसुगढ़को तीन नये राज्योंमें बाँट तीनों निपुण पुत्रोको उनका तख़्त संभलागए और इस तरह कामेसुगढ़से तीन नए राज्य काठीपुरम, मेहरगढ़ और सूरनगर बने।

महेंद्रसिंह: "कुठारसिंह और सूर्यसिंह (सुरनगरके राजा) हरवर्ष की तरह इस बारभी मेहरगढ़में शाही-सवारी निकलेगी, जिसमें तीनों राज्योंके राज परिवार शिरकत करतेहैं, लेकिन इस जालसाज-ठगने भयभीत किया हुआहैं।"
कुठारसिंह: "सुरक्षाके पुख्ता इंतजाम किये गएहैं, इस बार उसकी दुर्गति ही यहाँ खींचेगी।"

आभूषणोंसे जड़ी सुसज्जित रानियाँ, राजाओंके साथ राजसी-रथमें, सेनापति-मंत्री हाथियों पर, पीछे-पीछे पूरा कारंवा। जनतामें कुलीनोंके करीब आनेकी होड़ मचीहैं।  स्त्री-पुरुष रानियोंकी सुंदरता और राजाओंकी ठाट-बाट, रईशी पर रींझ रहेथे वही बच्चे एक साथ इतने सारे हाथी-घोड़े और ऊँट देखकर विस्मितथे।

"मेरा हार कहाँ गया?" मेहरगढ़की रानी सपकपायी! राज-कुनबेका सबसे श्रद्धास्पद आभूषण जिसे कामेसुकुमार की दादीको उनकी सासने दियाथा यकायक अलोप होगया। बात प्रतिष्ठाकी थी, राज्य प्रवेशमार्गके कपाट बंद कियेगए, घेराबंदी हुयी, एक-एक नागरिककी तलाशी लीगयी, भेदीयोंको लगाया गया। पूरे नगरमें दहशतंगेज़ी फ़ैलगयी लेकिन सुराग नहीं मिला।

इस संकटकालमें तीनो तजवीज़(सलाह) के लिए बैठे।
"जय बाबाबर्फानी! उड़ती हुयी एक बूढ़ी आवाज़ उनके कानोमें प्रतिध्वनित हुयी।
सूर्यसिंह चिल्लाया,'राजगुरु-मानुबाबा' पच्चीस साल बाद, बड़ा ही ख़ुशगवार पल आयाहैं।"
सबके दिल हिलोरें खाने लगा मानों जैसे मेलेमें माँ से बिछुडे बच्चेकी, माँ को देखतेही रुलाई फूट पड़तीहैं।

मानुबाबा: "अपने पूरे जीवन कालमें ऐसे विचित्र भयसे पहली बार सामना हुआहैं। दुश्मन बहुत स्यानाहैं  उसके अपराधोंकी संगीनताभी उतनीही विचित्रहैं। मुझे आभाष हो रहाहैं की उसका अगला पड़ाव सूरनगर होगा, कोई भयंकर अहित होनेको हैं। मैं कल सूरनगरमें ध्यान लगाताहूँ।  देवने चाहा तो पांचवे पहर सारे रहस्योंसे पर्दा हटा दूंगा।

बिना एक क्षण व्यर्थ किये पूरा रजवाड़ा और मानुबाबा दल-बल सहित सूरनगरको निकले। राजाओंकी आँखोंमें नींद कहाँ! पूरी रात खयालोमें कटती रही।  बाबाके भेजे दूतोंने संदेशा दियाकी तीनों राजाओंको सूरनगरके छोर पर स्थित पुराने दुर्ग पहुँचानाहैं वही बाबाने ध्यान लगायाहैं। तीनोको अलग-अलग आनेके लिए कहागया।

महेंद्रसिंह दुर्ग पहुंचे। दुर्गके बिलकुल मध्यमें एक बड़ा स्वस्तिक बनाथा उसके ऊपर बाबा ध्यान मग्नथे। बीचमें विघ्न पैदा करना उचित प्रतीत नहीं हुआ अंदरकी तरफ मशालोंकी रौशनीथी, भीतर जाकर देखा वह कुठारसिंह बैठाथा।
"मैं बहुत उतावला था, रहा नहीं गया और पहले चला आया, लेकिन मानुबाबा तो ध्यानमें है, वहां ऊपर बाबाने एक आदमीको बाँध रखा हैं।  लगताहैं वहीँ हैं 'अज्ञात-खतरा'।

दोनों ऊपरको लपके। ऊपर पहुँचतेही, गलेमें घुटी हूंक के साथ महेंद्रसिंह फर्शपर जा गिरा। कुठारसिंह पीछेसे घोपा हुआ खंजर निकालते हुआ बोला, मैंही हुँ 'अज्ञात-खतरा'।  महेंद्रसिंह फटी आँखोंसे देख रहाथा, कपकपायी आवाजमें बोला, तुमने ये सब क्यों किया? हमतो भाई हैं"
"कौनसे सगे भाईहैं, तीन रानियोंकी तीन संतानहैं, सौतेलेहैं हम।" मुझे अपना राज्य फैलानाहैं। अगरमें सीधा हमला करता तो तुम दोनों मिलकर मुझे परास्त करदेते।  इसलिए मैंने अपने विश्वासपात्रोसे मिलकर ये साज़िश रची।  एक राजाका अपनेही राज्यके हीरे-घोड़े गायब करना बहुत आसानहैं। रानीका पुश्तैनी हार भी मैंनेही अपनी पत्नीको बोलकर गायब करवायाथा, सबकी तलाशी हुयी लेकिन राजा-रानी की तलाशी कौन लेताहैं। मैं तुझे और सूर्यसिंह को 'अज्ञात-ख़तरे' की आड़ में मरवाता और फिर तीनो राज्यों पर राज करता लेकिन बीचमें ये बुड्ढा आगया और तेरी ज़िंदगीके बचे दिनभी खागया।
"मानुबाबा तुम्हे नहीं छोड़ेंगे राक्षस"
"वो बुड्ढा मेरा क्या बिगाड़ेगा, उसेतो पांचवे पहरमें पता चलेगा, उससे पहलेमें उसकी गर्दन उड़ादूंगा"

कुठारसिंह, मानुबाबाकी तरफ भागा, बाबा गहरे ध्यानमें, हवामें लहराती हुयी तलवार झटकेके साथ नीचे…

…तलवार नीचे आयी, कुठारसिंहके हाथ समेत नीचे जा गिरी।  कुठारसिंहका कटाहाथ तलवारके साथ नीचे पड़ाथा। हथकटे ख़ौफ़ज़दा कुठारसिंहकी तरफ बाबाने लाल-कुपित आँखोंसे देखा, झुर्रियोंमें छिपे होंठ प्रचंड आँखोंका विरोध करतेहुए अट्टहासमें बदलगए। इस अट्टहासमें एकऔर आवाज़ आ मिली। कुठारसिंह पलटा, इस क़हक़हे का स्वामी सूर्यसिंह खड़ाथा। कुठारसिंहकी सारी इन्द्रिया ज़वाब  देगयी।  उसे मरनेसे पहले जानना थाकी आखिर ये हुआ क्याहैं?

" 'अज्ञात-खतरे' से मेंभी स्तब्धथा, मेने तेरी सारी बातें सुनली।  मुझे नहीं पता थाकी तूही वो 'अज्ञात-खतरा' हैं, महेंद्रसिंहको मारकर तूने मेरा आधा काम करदिया 'अज्ञात-खतरे' हाहाहा। शाही-सवारी आयोज़नके दौरान विचार कौंधा की क्योंना 'अज्ञात-ख़तरे' का लाभ उठाकर बरसोसे सीनेमें पलरहे सपनेको पूरा कियाजाए? पच्चीस साल बाद राजगुरु मानु-बाबाको कौन पहचानेगा? हम तीनो तो उस समय बच्चेथे। मैंने अपने एक भरोसेमंदको मानुबाबा बनाया और तुम दोनोंको यहाँ बुलाया। तुम दोनोंको मारकर में लोगोंको कहूँगाकी 'अज्ञात-ख़तरे' ने तुम दोनोंको मारकर बाबाको क़ैद करलिया। तीनो राज्योंकी जनता मुझे राजा मान लेगी, उसके बादमै… " सूर्यसिंहकी बाकी बात अनकही रह गयी, घायल महेंद्रसिंहकी तलवारने उसका सर कलम करदिया। महेंद्रसिंहमें अभी जान बाकिथी, वो लड़खड़ाता हुआ जख्मी कुठारसिंहके पास पहुँचा और गला रेतदिया। महेंद्रसिंह नसोंमें अटकी समस्त प्राणवायु खीँच तलवार लिए नकली बाबाकी और दौड़ा लेकिन गश खाकर वहीं ढ़ेर होगया। दुर्गकी तमाशाई इमारतें अपनी बदक़िस्मती पर रो-रही थी, तीन भाई, तीन राजा, एक-दुसरे पर मरनेवाले, एक-दुसरे को मारदिया। लालचही वो 'अज्ञात-खतरा' था जिसकी कठपूतली बन ये स्वांग रच रहेथे फिर उस लालचने इनकी ज़िंदगीकी डोर खीचली।

==============================

Rating - 153/200

Yahan itne ghatnakramo ne bahut manoranjan kiya. Symbolic image art itne achchhe se kahani se ramti lag rahi hai. Bhasha sundar thi. Kuch jagah shabd anavshyak roop se jude lage. Ek achchhi waapsi ki badhaai aap dono ko.

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 272/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 01 (Giorgio & Dharmesh) #ftc1516

*) - Empty Frame

~Year: 2006~

An empty gold frame rested on the top of Betty Mason's dresser. She knew people thought she was crazy for keeping it there all empty and everything, but she never had the heart to put anything in it. It was meant for one thing and one thing only. She could still remember the day she got it. 

~Year: 1943~

"Betty, before I go I want to give you this." Lieutenant Will Mason said as he held package wrapped in brown paper out to her. They were sitting in his car about to say goodbye. 

"What is it?" Betty asked with curiosity. 

"Open it." and she did. She gazed in awe when she saw what was inside. 

"Oh, Will, this must of cost so much. Why?" She asked smiling at him. 

"For when I come home. I want you, me, and that little guy inside you, to have a picture taken." Will said, rubbing her stomach gently. 

"I'll save it then." Betty said smiling. 

"Now, I think I gotta go. Train whistles a blowin'." and with that grabbed his bag from the back and he and Betty got out of the car. 

"I'll write whenever I get a chance, I promise and I will return." Will said, sounding determined. 

"I'll be waiting for you." Betty said with unshed tears in her eyes. 

The two kissed and hugged for the last time before he boarded the train to England.

~Year:1944~

Betty sat and sewed on the sofa while little Willy played in his pen. The radio played some big band in the background. Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." Betty called as she got up. When she opened the door she saw what she'd hope she'd never have to see. It was an army man, dressed nice and crisp. He took off his hat when she opened the door.

"Mrs. Mason?" he asked, making sure. She nodded her head yes, not trusting her voice.

"I'm afraid to inform you that your husband is dead. He died honorably though. To be honest he saved my life and many others." he said as he played with his hat. He wasn't looking her in the eye, he didn't want to see his pain mirrored back.

Betty broke down right there, she couldn't wait till he'd left. The man in door didn't really know what to do, so he rubbed her back slightly, feeling a little uncomfortable doing so.

"Was he in pain?" Betty finally asked, the man looked at her slightly confused.

"When he died, was he in pain?" she asked.

"I don't think so, he died instantly. I was right next to him." the man said. 

"Thank you, sir, but if you don't mind I'd like to be alone with my son now." she said quietly and the man nodded his goodbye and left. 

~Year:2006~

Betty walked into her room to get something before she left to go to the airport. She was going to see her grandson graduate from Lackland. She was proud of him, she stopped though on her way out to look at the frame, although no image was in it, she still would stop once and a while. Her son, Will, had faught in Vietnam and had stuck with the job. He was now a Major in the Army. William Mason III had followed his father's and grandfather's steps in the military and was about to graduate from Air Force basic training. Betty wouldn't miss this graduation for anything in the world.

=============================

Beautiful! :(

Rating - 140/200

Total points after 2 Rounds - 265/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

Round 2 - Team # 19 (Dheeraj & Anurag) #ftc1516

गांधी ने कहा ये सुभाष से।

क्या बैर है तुम्हें स्वराज से।

क्यों करते हो तुम व्यर्थ विरोध।

क्यों लगा रहे हो स्वतंत्रता में अवरोध।

अगर हम नहीं करेंगे उनका सहयोग।

फिर आजादी का कैसे बनेगा संयोग।

वे हमारे भाग्य विधाता हैं।

उनसे ही अंतिम आशा है।

सुन कर वचन गांधी के ठोस।

गंभीर भाव में बोले तब बोस।

बापू आप हो भोले बड़े।

नहीं समझ रहे इनके पैंतरे।

नहीं मंशा इनकी देना स्वराज।

देंगे धोखा जब पूरा होगा काज।

अगर पाना है सच में स्वराज।

तो करो साहस कर दो आगाज।

आजाद हिंद है अगर सपना तो लहू तो बहाना होगा।

फूंक कर क्रांति का बिगुल सोये जन मानस को जगाना होगा।

=====================

Rating - 118/200

Is rating par mat jaaiye, ye entry, art-kavita mujhe apne bachpan mey le gayi. CBSE aur regional boards ki kitaabo mey jaisi kavitayen hoti hai waisi rachna thi. Par phir wahi baat ki vishay, pratibha anusaar itna kuch tha karne ko. Vistrit baat ko jaldi niptana laga. To yahan ye adhoorapan akhra.

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 252/400

Round 2 - Team # 25 (Navneet & Vaibhav) #FTC1516

*) - कुवल्यपीड - गोविन्द

काल : 3096 ई.पू.

स्थान : मथुरा ,भारत

चियायांss !  मेघ समान गरजती उस चिंघाड़ ने मानो पूरे नगर के लोगो का लहु सर्द कर दिया ।

अपनी सूंड से तूफ़ान फुंफकारते उस मदमस्त जलजले को देख कई तो भय से जड़वत हो गए थे और कईयों की तो मानो हृदय गति ही रुक गई थी ।

अंकुशहीन , उस गरजते बवण्डर के पथ में एक रोती हुई दो वर्षीय बालिका नज़र तो सबको आ रही थी किन्तु उसे कुचले जाते हुए देखने के अलावा कोई कर भी क्या सकता था ।

तभी , सरसराती हवा को चीरता हुआ , चुस्त बाघ मानिंद , एक मेघवर्णी जिस्म , कुवल्यपीड की दिशा में बढ़ा ।

मेघनाद करते कुवल्यपीड ने जब दोनों टाँगे ज़मीन पर वापस रखी, तो उसे उस बच्ची की कुचली लाश देखने की उम्मीद थी , परंतु वहाँ कुछ न था ।

उसने देखा कि बच्ची तो उस मेघवर्ण वाले , छरहरे बदन के ,लगभग 16 वर्षीय युवा के हाँथो में थी ।

उसने बच्ची को एक बलिष्ठ युवा के हाँथो में देकर कहा -" दाऊ भईया ,कदाचित गजराज की बुद्धि यथोचित स्थान पर नहीँ है , मैं जरा इनकी अक्ल वापस ठिकाने लगाकर आता हूं ।"

दाऊ बोले- "ध्यान से गोविन्द ! यह कुछ ज्यादा ही उन्मत मालूम पड़ता है ।"

अब कुवल्यपीड और गोविन्द ने एक दूसरे की आँखों में आँखे डाली , मानो दोनों अपने प्रतिद्वंदी को तौल रहे हों।

कुवल्यपीड भागता हुआ जब एकदम निकट आ गया तो गोविन्द ने विद्युत गति से अपना स्थान छोड़ दिया ।

भड़ाकss! मदमस्त हाथी का सिर दीवार से जा भिड़ा और उसके सिर में पीड़ा की लहर दौड़ गई ।

"वहाँ कहाँ मुझे तरबूज़ों के मध्य खोज रहे हो गजराज, मैं यहाँ हूँ ।" - गोविन्द का यह ताना सुनकर क्रोधित हाथी फिर उस पर लपका ।

पास पड़ा एक डंडा उठा के गोविन्द ने हाथी की बाँई तरफ उछाला , जिस से हाथी एक क्षण को दिगभ्रमित हुआ, उसी एक क्षण में चुस्ती से उसकी सूंड पर हाथ टिका , गोविन्द उसके मस्तक पर जा बैठा ।

गोविन्द ने तेज़ी से वह धागे तोड़े , जिनसे दो छोटी छोटी घण्टियाँ हाथी के कानों में लटकी थीं ; जितना तेज़ वो दौड़ता , घण्टियाँ उसके कानों में बजती और शोर से तनावग्रस्त हो वह विनाश का दूत बन जाता।

फिर गोविन्द ने उसके कानों के पीछे ,नीचे की तरफ "विधुर" मर्म पर विशिष्ट दबाव डाला । (विधुर मर्म श्रोत्रेन्द्रिय संचालक है )

कुवल्यपीड को एकदम सारा संसार शोरविहीन लगा ; एक अभूतपूर्व शान्ति का एहसास हुआ , जैसे परमेश्वर स्वयं उसका मस्तक सहला रहे हों ।

गोविन्द ने इशारा करके उसे बैठाया ; एक तरबूज़ के दो फाड़ किये और फिर उसके साथ मजे से खाने लगा मानों दोनों बचपन के मित्र हों ।

बाद में सैनिक कुवल्यपीड को ले गए ; जाते जाते वह पलटा और सूंड उठाकर उस मधुर मन मोहक मुस्कान वाले गोविन्द को अभिवादन किया ।

मथुरा नगर में लोगों की चहलकदमी धीरे धीरे फिर बढ़ी जो इस बात का घोतक थी कि फिलहाल वहाँ शान्ति बहाल है ।

बुद्धि  और धैर्य मनुष्य के वो साथी हैं, जिसके बल पर वह विकट से विकट परिस्थिति को भी अपने अनुकूल बना सकता है ।

===============

Rating - 113/200

Mujhe lagta hai ki vishay mey jitni sambhavna thi utna pahunch nahi paaye lekhak. Bhasha shaili sundar hai. Saath mey kalakriti sundar hai par shayad ye kalakaar ka usual style nahi hai to prakritik nahi lagi.

Total Points after 2 Rounds - 221/400

Judge - Mohit Trendster

#ftc1516 #freelance_talents #freelancetalents #mohitness